30. John McClane (Die Hard)- My favorite police officer of all time. Anywhere this guy goes a shit storm of bad events always follow. John McClane is the stereotypical New York cop with a big attitude and even bigger mouth. A wise ass to the core he sees no problem making fun of the bad guys just before he kills them or even while they kicking the shit out of him. He may not look like much but he’s smart, resourceful, deceptive, and a crack shot with his Beretta. One thing I always like about McClane was that he was just a regular guy who maintained a sense of coolness. He never made himself out to be anything more than he was and he wouldn’t even call himself a hero. In four movies McClane always got the shit kicked out of him but he managed to always pull through.
Best Scene- Between the first and third film take your. pick. My favorite was in the first film when he dropped a dead body onto a police car in order to get the cops attention and screamed, “Welcome to the party pal!” That was my high school senior quote…how appropriate.
Best Quote- “Yippie kay yay mother fucker!”
Best Scene- Striking fear in hearts of his friends by accusing Henry of insulting him.
Best Quote- “You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?”
28. Mr. Blonde (Reservoir Dogs)- At first sight Mr. Blonde looks like a relatively nice guy. He’s soft spoken and gives off a relaxed vibe. In reality, Mr. Blonde is one crazy son of a bitch who lacks mercy of any sort. He’s willing to do whatever it takes to make a successful score even if it means blowing a hole in some young girls head for not listening. He has style, confidence, coolness, and a good taste in 70’s Light Rock music.
Best Quote-“Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?”
Shining Moment- Smooth talking the Mayor of New York to get the Ghostbusters back in business in order to save the day.
Best Quote- Mayor: “Is this true?”
Venkmen: “Yes it’s true. This man has no dick.”
26. Gollum (The Lord of the Rings)- One of the most tortured souls ever to be created. Gollum was once a man, named Smeagol, who allowed the power of the Ring to consume his very existence. So entranced by its power and his own obsession for it Gollum forced himself to live a life of seclusion for centuries. As a result, Gollum became a schizophrenic and developed a split personality. Do not be fooled by his weak innocence. It is a mere cover. He strikes when everyone least expects it and he is one of the most important characters in the LOTR series.
Best Scene- In The Two Towers, when his two personalities were arguing over Frodo’s fate. While it was comical it clearly displayed his torture.
Best Quote- “My…precious!”
25. The Bride (Kill Bill)- She’s merciless. She’s relentless. She’ll fucking decapitate you with one clean stroke of her sword. She is The Bride (aka Beatrix Kiddo). She embodies the perfect mixture of beauty and rage. If there ever was another female character seeking revenge she fails miserably in comparison to the Bride. The fire in her eyes makes it abundantly clear she means business. The Bride is a ticking time bomb just waiting to go off. Make sure you’re not in her path when she explodes.
Best Scene- Slicing her way through 88 armed Japanese bodyguards before fighting O-Ren Ishii.
Best Quote-"Those of you lucky enough to have your lives, take them with you. However, leave the limbs you've lost. They belong to me now.”
24. Napoleon Dynamite (Napoleon Dynamite)- Who the hell draws ligers? Before seeing this movie I had no idea what a liger even was. Napoleon is a character that is vastly different from any other movie character. He’s unique in his own special way. In order to understand how unique he is you have to see him in action because words don't do him justice. America immediately fell in love with him whether it was due to his nun chucking abilities or his dancing skills. There will never be another character like Napoleon.
Best Scene- Showing the entire school that although he may be weird he can definitely dance his ass off.
Best Quote- “I see you're drinking 1%. Is that 'cause you think you're fat? 'Cause you're not. You could be drinking whole if you wanted to.”
23. Dracula- He’s one of the darkest villains out there. How can you reason with a man who has no soul? It’s quite simple really…you can’t. Dracula can manipulate you just as easily as he can kill you. He does not seek world or galaxy domination like other villains. Like Peter Bretter (Jason Segal) says in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, “He’s just a man seeking love.”, which is why is so tortured and must inflict this misery on others. There have been many people to play the role of Dracula all with their own take. Whether its Bela Lugosi, Christopher Lee, or Gary Oldman each actor has recreated the undead legend in their own glorious way.
Best Scene- It all depends on which movie/version you like.
Best Quote-“I am the monster that breathing men would kill. I am Dracula.”
22. Wolverine (X-Men I,II, III, & Origins)- Snikt! Once you hear that particular sound of those claws popping out it means one thing and one thing only…you’re going to fuck-ing die! One of my favorite super-hero’s due to his loner attitude, short temper, fighting skills, and the complexity of his own inner character. Do not mistake Wolverine for a man. At his very core he is an animal waiting to rip his enemies to shreds.
Best Scene- His berserker rage in the Xavier Mansion in X2. Within minutes he single-handedly killed a Special-Ops team. I’ll say it again….within minutes.
Best Quote- “You wanna shoot me, then shoot me!”
21. Randall Graves (Clerks)- As I said before, Randall is the unofficial voice of the early 90’s and every person who has ever worked a shitty customer service job. He sees no use in sugar coating life’s lessons because he’s fully aware that life isn’t easy and to portray things in a manner which they are not would only be a lie. Few characters have eloquently expressed their true frustrations about the world without seeming ridiculous. Everything Randall says has a much deeper meaning with significant value. It’s just that you have to get passed his cynicism first in order to understand it.
Best Scene- Ignoring a mother and child while making a phone order of cliché named porn video tapes.
Best Quotes- “People say crazy shit during sex. One time I called this girl "Mom." And “This job would be great if it wasn't for the fucking customers.”