Thursday, May 27, 2010

Terrible Thursday: Batman and Robin (1997)

By far this is the worst Batman film ever to be created and definitely one of the most horrible films ever. There are so many flaws with this film its laughable. If one were to be on some mind altering drugs and watch this movie they may consider it a comedy. The casting, the dialogue, the set design, and several other factors contributed to this titanic mess.

Today, George Clooney is a highly respected actor with a diverse resume, which includes an Oscar. While he didn’t have that little golden statue in the 90’s he was a star on the rise. As everyone knows the Batman character is darker than the average superhero. Batman is a man of mystery who is deeply troubled by his past. It’s safe to say that Clooney represented none of the traditional characteristics of the Cape Crusader. Out of all the actors to don the cape and cowl Clooney was the worst. Surprisingly, Clooney doesn’t have any regrets about the film. In an interview back in 2008 he told Showbiz Spy, “I don’t regret anything…with hindsight it’s easy to look back at Batman and go, ‘Woah! that was really shit, and I was really bad in it. The truth is, Batman is still the biggest break I ever had. It changed my career. I wouldn’t be doing this now if it hadn’t been for Batman.” If you look at his resume on IMDB he is correct. Before Batman and Robin barely any of his movies stood out, except for From Dusk Till Dawn. Most of his breaks cames after this film. Therefore, you can understand why he took on the role. It was the right move at the time.

However, George Clooney is not the only person to blame for this awful piece of cinema which I speak of. Arnold Schwarzenegger, who played Mr. Freeze, is also at fault. I will go as far to say that he was the worst part of the movie. He repeatedly killed the audience with his corny one line jokes and abysmal acting. I hesitate to even use the term “acting” when speaking of Arnold and his performance because it was anything but. I never understood why they chose Arnold for that part. Just like Clooney, Arnold’s role in Batman and Robin was the worst of his career next to Junior. As for Uma Thurman, who played Poison Ivy, I’ll skip over her because she was the least of the films problems. I do have an issue with the incorporation of Bane. Here is the only villain to best Batman in the comics and the writers turned him into a second rate henchman incapable of speaking. What the shit is that about? If anything Bane deserves to be the only villain in a Batman movie. Blasphemy!

Let us now move on to Chris O’Donnell. I didn’t mind O’Donnell in Batman Forever. He seemed to fit the character at that point in the story. He correctly displayed the emotions of a young man hell bent on his own mission of revenge. With that said, he provided no support in Batman and Robin and his acting was shitty. If you thought the misery ended there you were wrong. Let us not forget Alicia Silverstone as Bat-Girl. I have less of issue with Silverstone than I do with how her character was portrayed. First, the Bat-Girl character in the comics is the daughter of Commissioner Gordon not Alfred’s niece who speaks with an American accent. Moreover, where was her characters’ training? She may have been athletic and a daredevil but when Batman takes a new protégé he works them to the bone. It would have been cool to see some of that stuff. For me, that was such a hole in the plot.

When one thinks about Batman and Robin it’s hard to forget the films biggest nemesis…director Joel Schumacher. Many people personally blame him for the numerous errors in this film. Others may say it was Warner Bros. fault for wanting to go in a more kid friendly direction. Whatever you may think, Schumacher was the one who put nipples on the Bat suit (a mortal sin by the way). He changed the entire ambiance of the story. Long gone were tall buildings and dark alley ways filled with smoke where Batman would seek out justice. Instead it was replaced by colorful set designs that glowed in the dark under black lights. I don’t understand why he decided, or agreed, to go in this direction. Here is a guy who directed St. Elmo’s Fire, The Lost Boys, Flatliners, Falling Down, The Client, and A Time To Kill. Those were all very good movies. I guess he got carried away with himself.

All in all, Batman and Robin is pure trash at its finest. I’ll be honest I’ve taken dumps that have looked and smelled prettier than this movie.

Overall: F


  1. Favorite line: "Ice to see you, Batman!"
    The 90s "Batman The Animated Series" Mr. Freeze was a much richer and deeper character than Arnold's.

  2. Without a doubt! His character was truly made of ice...excuse the pun. His pain was much more evident and that was a cartoon.

  3. good one Yero but I prefer "Everybody chill"

  4. Another good one "What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age!"

    What a piece of garbage. Batman doesn't smile. Get George Clooney a scalpel and send him back to ER.